I remember overhearing a discussion between my father and a friend of his a long time ago. This friend of my father’s had three sons and whenever he visited us, he envied all the attention my father received from his five doting daughters, how affectionate we were towards him and how much we loved to spoil him. I remember the two of them talking and when his friend lightheartedly expressed his jealousy, my father replied with something along the lines of, “The love of a daughter is similar to eating a rare, delicious and unique fruit; you cannot describe how it tastes to a person who has not had the opportunity to eat it.” Of course this was ages ago and I never thought about it until I was fortunate enough to have a daughter of my own. I know that she is very young and I have yet to wholly experience what my father did, but having her in my life is such a huge pleasure that I can’t help but think about the depth of his feelings towards us and how much joy he must be experiencing everyday just by coming home to be loved and followed around by his little girls.
I feel these thirteen months of being a mother have been the happiest phase of my life so far and it is all down to the small ways my daughter brightens up my life. These are no earth-shattering discoveries that I have made after becoming a mother and some of them might even sound superficial, but I really enjoy how conscious I am of my happiness when I experience motherhood through these tiny fragments of my day and how easily my daughter contributes to the joy in my life just by being herself.
- My daughter has exposed me to degrees of tenderness I never knew existed within me. We all experience love in some way and form in our lives, but I feel that when you have a child, you are overwhelmed by the sheer intensity of the love you feel for them. You realize that you never knew you were capable of loving so deeply and selflessly. My daughter has exposed me to this side of myself and even though it still takes me by surprise sometimes, I revel in its beauty and rejoice in this new path to self-discovery.
- It is amazing to see how a little girl, who doesn’t even speak yet, can wrap a grow man around her finger. The best part of my day now is to watch the mini-reunion that happens in our home every evening when my husband comes back from work. My daughter crawls as fast as she can when she hears his keys jingling outside the door, she sits in anticipation until he enters and the smile that she gives him is different from the one she has been giving me all day. They walk around, with her pointing to various things around the room, as if she is telling him stories about them and The Husband will happily do it as long as she isn’t distracted by something on the floor that she needs. What I also like to see is the look of disappointment on my husband’s face when he comes back from work and she is down for a nap. It is nice to see how much he was looking forward to seeing her and how much he missed her. This daily ritual makes me emotional beyond words and I love every minute of it.
- I am sure all parents wish to raise their kids to be confident, independent, respectful and kind. But when you have a daughter, this is more than an aim; it is an ambition. I have no road map on how I will achieve it, but I have a very distinct idea of the kind of woman I wish my daughter will be one day. And even as a toddler, she exhibits some very remarkable aspects in her personality that I would be proud to see in her when she grows older. I love how determined she is, she doesn’t give up easily and keeps on trying until she has figured out a solution to her problem. She fights her fights honorably. If something belongs to her, she will take it unapologetically and if it belongs to someone else, she always offers to share and if the other kid refuses, she moves on. She loves reading all kinds of books. In fact, she loves having reading material of some form within an arm’s reach everywhere. She knows when she has lost a fight and doesn’t scream or cry about it. She composes herself and moves on to something else.
- I know that little boys are very cute too, but there are some very adorable aspects of motherhood that you get to enjoy only if you have a daughter. Dressing up and accessorizing my daughter is such a joyful task and it always leaves me smiling from ear to ear when I see her looking at herself in the mirror and noticing a new outfit or a hair accessory, which mostly leads to her pulling it off. Nevertheless, shopping for my daughter and dressing her up is a lovely treat and I want to enjoy it to the maximum until the wars start on what she wants to wear and why she thinks a crown goes well with her outfit. When she was learning to walk, I loved to watch her get on her tippy toes, with her arms raised like a tiny ballerina. This was such an adorable sight that I often I stopped what I was doing just to soak it in and hopefully remember it forever. I don’t know if all little girls are as affectionate as mine, because she just loves to surprise us with unexpected bouts of hugs and kisses during the day. I realize that this too won’t last forever and I try to get the most out of this wild display of affection.
- Finally, I love to talk to my daughter about things that interest me. If I am babbling on about makeup, blogging or new fashion trends, I always find her listening, as if I have told her something she can relate to. When I change my bag after a few weeks, she immediately notices and checks what I am carrying and what kind of hardware is on this one. Similarly she notices when I am dressed up to go out and always wants to touch my lipstick, which is cute but also a bit of a bummer if I am ready to walk out the door. She loves shoes and enjoys wearing jewelry more than anything. She happily goes around wearing my statement necklaces or the rings of her stacking toy as bangles in both hands.
When I was pregnant and didn’t know the gender of our baby, The Husband and I used to talk about whether we wanted a girl or a boy. I of course, always wanted a daughter and even though The Husband liked the idea of having a daughter, he was a bit apprehensive, purely because he felt that he wouldn’t be able to understand her and they wouldn’t remain very close as she grew older. I used to tell him “Oh you just wait and watch. You will be surprised.” And this is exactly what happened. Now when I ask him if he is enjoying raising a daughter, he laughs at his old fears and really can’t imagine any situation in which he would have trouble understanding her. And I consider myself really lucky that I get to witness first hand, the development of this very special bond.